Me .... and my flaws

I have flaws. I have a lot of them. I used to hate that. I struggled to be the best at everything. To be everything to everyone. If I wasn’t perfect at something, I hated myself for it. I wanted to be a stunning cricketer, a brilliant painter, a fabulous singer, among other things. I ran up against my own limits without understanding that we all have things we are good at and things we aren’t. I have zero sense of rhythm so for as much as I love singing, I couldn’t match a rhythm with the music.I have difficulty seeing the possibilities beyond the reality so I never found the inspiration to creat great paintings.

It’s taken me years to understand this one simple thing: flaws are better. They make you interesting. That I didn’t do those things perfectly doesn’t make me less of a person. It makes me more of one. It gives me empathy for others. Because mostly, we aren’t brilliant at our lives. We are mundane. We go thru our lives the way we are told we should. We graduate from high school, go to college, get a job, get married, have children, grow old without really thinking about it. Most of us can deal with this. It’s enough. Some of us can’t though. We search for more.

I used to think this was a miserable fate, to be boring, to be just like everyone else, to not be special. What I’ve found over and over again is my life is that most people are just that and they still manage to create beautiful things. They still inspire one another. They still seem amazing to others regardless of how they see themselves.

I like my flaws. I surround myself with others who see value in my flaws and in this way I create strength and value in myself and others.